I have begun work on a new
section on my website. It's a section dedicated to some of the dolls I've made
and sold on eBay. I'll be adding the stories and pictures as often as I can.
I'll be presenting dolls for sale as they
become available. I don't take special orders because I simply don't have the
time. But I'll do my very best to make as many available here as I can. I'm just
getting started! Take
a look!
This is long, but necessary in telling you what's going on in my
life.
I just wanted to let you know that I have an update at the end of this
section.
I posted this recent situation of mine recently. I want to thank the few
people who wrote and wished me well. Your encouragement means more to me than
you know.
Now, on with the news....
OMG, girlfriends, friends, and customers, you are NOT going to believe the
past few weeks I've had ...
.....on Friday, November 16, at around 9:00 in the morning, I fell and broke my
right thigh bone...that's right, my femur....AS IF BEING AN AMPUTEE IN THE
FIRST PLACE WASN'T BAD ENOUGH!!
What a nightmare.
Every amputee who has ever fallen and injured their real leg has had that
fear of actually breaking their real leg.
It could happen.
And it DID happen with me.
It started with my newest cat Oboe.
I had gotten up that Friday morning and decided to go ahead and go to the
kitchen to grind my coffee beans before coming in here to check my email.
I usually check my mail first, but that morning I didn't.
Also, I talk to my boyfriend Tom every night on the phone. We don't hang up till
we're ready to go to sleep. So, I get up the next morning and bring my portable
phone back in here to charge back up.
It just happens to be my favorite phone.
Bu that morning I didn't hang it back up, I carried it with me. At the time I
had no idea how lucky I was to have had my phone with me.
I have never carried it with me to the kitchen before....never. Not in the
morning like that. I have phones all over the house and there's no reason to
carry it with me.
I remember that being one of the last thoughts in my head, that I still had my
phone with me.
So, I get to the end of the hallway and Oboe comes racing down behind me. He
ran between my legs and BANG...he hit me head on and it knocked me off
balance.
When I went to fall back I came out of my wooden legs just enough to actually
snap my right thigh bone clean in half.
And I totally heard it break, loud and clear.
OUCH!
.....OMG...I couldn't believe the pain. I couldn't believe what just happened.
And I cried like you wouldn't believe. I laid on my stomach, which is how I
landed, and I felt down into my sweat pants, panty hose, and underwear till I
could reach down my leg socket to see if I could feel 'wet' bone. I wanted to
know if it protruded the skin.
It didn't, thank GOD.
I had heard it break, and felt it, so I KNEW it was broken, but I didn't know
how badly it was broken.
I then sat up and pull off my pants, panty hose, and took my legs off. I'll
never forget how painful that was to do.
Everything was tight, everything was heavy.
And I'll never forget holding my injured leg from underneath, picking it up, and
half of it stayed on the floor.
*shudder*
For those who may not know, both of my legs are removed right at the knee. I've
been like this since I was 5 years old. So, I've been walking on wooden legs for
47 years.
I was so upset, scared, hurt, you name it.
And it was Friday. I was to see my sweetie that night. I had such a full day
ahead of me with lots to do. I even planned on listing three clown dolls that I
had just made.
I didn't even have Tom's office number. We always emailed during the day. I
had no way to reach him at work. I knew he had already left for work and would
wonder why he wasn't hearing from me all day. So I couldn't call him at home.
I HAD to find a way to reach him to tell him what happened.
I was also upset that this ruined my upcoming Thanksgiving dinner I planned to
cook for Tom.
:-(
So, right when I was trying to figure out how to get to the nearest phone, I
remembered that I had been carrying the portable phone that I was talking on the
night before.
Again, THANK GOD.
I called 911.
When they got here I had the EMS guy go into my computer room and email Tom
and tell him what happened. I also keep my cell phone charged up in here, so I
asked the EMS guy to grab that for me, too.
So, after much Morphine and agony they got me loaded and I was on my way to
Spartanburg Regional Hospital, here in Spartanburg, SC.
Tom got my message and he was at the hospital within two hours, bless his
heart. He lives about an hour and a half away from me.
Then the REAL nightmare began. First, the Keystone Cops took my x-rays.
Don't even get me started.
But, to be fair, no one ever knows quite what to do with me. My legs are off
right at the knees, so I'm not exactly 'textbook' in dealing with me in a lot of
situations.
But I was in unbelievable pain and every time they changed their mind about a
position to put me in or banged the bed into other furniture I was in total
agony.
It started off with two girls doing the x-rays, then ended up with 8 people
getting involved. Everyone had their own ideas and some were tried, some failed,
some pictures had to be taken again and again, and all I knew was, I HURT AND
WANTED IT ALL TO END.
More nightmare.....a team of doctors had no idea how to fix me. They needed to
find the BEST way to set my broken femur so I could continue to wear my
artificial legs, once I was healed...which could take a few months or more.
I've never gone thru anything like this before in my LIFE. Not like THIS.
So, I sat in the that hospital from Friday till Tuesday with an 'unset'
broken leg. They finally knocked me out on that Tuesday and put a plastic
'whatever' on me till they could continue to figure out how to fix me.
My leg still wasn't 'set'.
Then, on Wednesday, the next day, they sent me to Greenville Memorial
Hospital, about 30 minutes away. That's where the better surgeons were. And it
was decided that surgery was the only way to go....rods, plates, screws, the
whole bit.
This was horrible. I had no idea what to expect. I was scared. I mean, what
am I going to do when I get home? I have absolutely NO family down here to help
me. I live alone!
They had me so drugged up that the entire first week of my hospital stay was
mostly a blur, and still is.
Then Thanksgiving arrived and Tom brought us some Cracker Barrel turkey
dinners and we ate in my hospital room together. He was so good to me. He was
coming all the way here to feed my cats and tend to things, as well as stay a
lot of nights at my place so he could visit me. He still spent every weekend at
my house. He had special privileges to stay as long as he liked, too.
:-)
Tom is an absolute ANGEL. He's my hero!
Then Friday came and they did surgery.
More OUCH.
And Tom was right there for me. When I woke up I was surprised to see that he
had flowers waiting in my room for me.
So, it took exactly a week before they could set my leg properly. I
sat for a week on a broken leg.
I can tell you this much, the entire nearly two weeks I was in the hospital
they KEPT me on 10 mg of Dilaudid every two hours around the clock.
I hurt so bad.
I also had morphine and Lortab and Adivan.
They put me on real potent calcium tablets and I had to have Heparin shots every
day so I wouldn't get a blood clot from the break in my femur.
I spent almost two weeks laying on my back. I still can't sleep in any other
position. The rods and surgical areas hurt too much for me to lay any other way
but on my back.
By the way.....I came home on Wednesday, November 28, 2007. And on December
3rd, 2007 I had my stitches taken out.
I feel a little better having the stitches out.
People have no clue how violent this surgery is. I'm bruised where they did
the actual surgery, but not where I broke my bone. Isn't that amazing?
And the surgical areas ache more than the broken bone. THAT'S how violent and
rough the surgery was in order to shove a bunch of metal rods up against my leg
bones, all the way to the hip. Then, metal plates and screws hold the rods and
broken bones in place so they can heal.
And, I had five places that really hurt me at any given time. I had three
points of surgical entry. Then I had the actual bone break, THEN the back of my
butt started hurting. And that's where they put the plate, screws, etc. So, I
was always in pain somewhere. It was horrible.
Even my skin, right at the place where the bone broke, hurt and was so sensitive
that even having the sheet on me at night was painful. It hurt to wear pants.
And there was nothing I could do. Nothing.
But the day after coming home, when I was alone for the first time, I cried
off and on all day. I kept tearing up. This situation has screwed up so many of
my plans...so many.
And, it's normal to be a little depressed after something like this happens.
But I'm very limited in mobility. I can't use my sewing machine because the
leg I broke is my 'machine pedal' leg. So, I have no idea how much 'sewing' I'll
be able to actually do, but I'm going to keep working as much as I can. I need
the money. You can't believe how expensive my meds are for something like this.
:-(
And I'm not allowed to wear my wooden legs while I heal, and this can take
MONTHS.
Anyway...at some point while in the hospital I had my last auction go off...a
shelf sitter kitty, and Tom came here to my house and boxed it for me and sent
it out. Isn't that sweet of him? He's never done that before...not like this. As
drugged up as I was, I was able to talk him thru it over the phone.
But he had come here to my place and checked my mail for me and saw that I had a
sale. He also knows that I ship out as soon as possible, after I'm paid. So, he
kept my business going for me, bless his big heart.
:-)
See, even having this kind of a situation was no reason to be a deadbeat seller.
The customers have to be taken care of. And I thank Tom for helping me.
It's something to think about, but I believe that any seller and even a buyer
should keep some information handy for someone they trust to take care of
business for them. In the past I even called people and had them write to my
customers, like the time my electricity went out due to an ice storm. I had no
power, no computer, nothing. So, my friend wrote to them and explained my
situation.
My wonderful customers were so understanding and 57 hours later when my power
was restored, I was able to ship the items out.
Anyway..... I had never in my life had to have a wheelchair, so I had to have
a few days of physical therapy in the hospital so they could teach me how to use
one. The hospital provided a wheelchair for me for here at home.
I hate being in a wheelchair.
I hate not walking.
I hate hurting all the time.
I hate not being 5' 9".
But, it'll end one day and I'll be back to normal.
I can get around without my legs real well, normally...but I'm injured. I still
have a broken leg and I have to be careful....so it makes it all the more
difficult to be in this situation.
And I can't tell you how uncomfortable this wheelchair is on that one hip. It's
awful. I've put cushions in the seat, etc, but I just have to deal with it.
Oh, and I'll be having a new set of high tech legs made and I can't WAIT.
I'll tell you more about them another time. They'll blow your mind. I'll finally
be The Bionic Woman!!
I haven't had a new pair of legs in over 18 years...so, I'm more than overdue. I
just take really good care of them. They are very expensive and I make them last
as long as possible.
And my new Bionic legs? Try $40,000 EACH. Yes, you read that right.
I'm just glad I don't have to wear a cast. It would be much harder to get
around if I had a cast on that leg. Not to mention that in order to keep it on
it would have to go to my waist.
I remember that being one discussion when the doctors were figuring out what
to do with me. But they had to get this right because my legs have to be able to
manage wooden legs. If it doesn't heal right they'll have to re-break my leg and
start over.
I pray that doesn't happen, so I'm being as careful as possible.
I'm in a little less pain with each passing day. I'm amazed at how well I've
adapted to my wheelchair and at getting things done around here. I've not been
working on dolls, but I have been cleaning and organizing around the house.
I get around much easier and better OUT of the chair than I do IN it. It's very
uncomfortable on my leg and hips. But, I deal with it.
But I can tell you, there's NO WAY I'd have this much mobility if I were in a
cast. I'm glad I had the surgery.
Tom arrived on the weekend of my hospital release, as usual. He was a huge
help to me over the weekend. He's an absolute angel.
He went to the grocery store for me and has done all sorts of things around here
that I can't do myself.
He even cooked breakfast and dinner for me.
I can do a lot, and I'm VERY independent, but I can't do EVERYTHING.
So, I can't drive my truck, can't go to the stores, can't do the things I'm
used to doing. I'm stuck here till the weekends when Tom arrives.
When I say I'm alone down here, I'm really alone. I have no family at all. And
my girlfriend lives a half hour away from me. And she's getting ready to go to
Germany for a few weeks.
I stay busy, and this week I hope to get back to work on some dolls. I had
finished three more ugly clown dolls to list and was going to list them during
the afternoon of November 16th....before Tom's arrival.
But things sure didn't work out that way, did they?
:-(
I had a very surreal moment that first week. I was gathering garbage from my
little garbage cans from around the house and reached the one in my laundry
area, which is just a few feet from where I fell.
I looked in and saw all these syringes and 'blister' packs and medical debris. I
was puzzled. Then it dawned on me....those things were used on ME.
I had forgotten.
I had forgotten so many things about the morning this happened. The EMS had
given me my IV and Morphine and all kinds of stuff before ever getting me off
the floor. And now I remember the EMS guy asking me if I had a trash can.
It's obvious to me that those were the things he was throwing away.
I just can't describe how strange it was to find those things and that I
forgot they were used on me.
I suppose that's what trauma will do to someone, huh?
There are millions of little details and funny things, as well as scary
things. Tom and I have a wicked good sense of humor and we've found so much to
laugh about and have fun with.
So this is the gist of what's been going on in my life in the past few weeks.
Things are going to be better, and I'm going to be just fine. And my new
legs, when I eventually get them, will make my life even BETTER!
"Gentlemen, we can rebuild her. We have the technology. We have the
capability to build the world's newest Bionic woman.
Catt Alexander will be that woman.
Better than she was before.
Better, stronger, faster."
UPDATE!
Well, here it is January 8, 2008. Lots of positive updates to tell you about.
First of all, I can use my sewing machine. I just put the pedal under my broken
leg, apply pressure, and I'm in sewing heaven. No, it doesn't hurt. So, I'm back
in business!
On January 10th I go to the doctors for my first x-rays since the surgery. I
hope all is well, and I suspect it is. Otherwise, it's back to surgery for me.
But trust me, I'm VERY careful.
I'm in almost no pain at all now. Once in a while the place behind my butt
starts to hurt while I sleep and I'll take a half of a Lortab and I'm fine. So,
I'm almost completely pain pill free. I don't need much of a pain pill in order
for it to help me. I don't like the euphoric feelings it gives, so I really want
to be off the things as soon as I can.
I'm back to cooking and almost all the things I was doing BEFORE this
nightmare began. I take care of my home and do as much as I can on my own. I
clean, cook, do dishes, change the bed sheets, vacuum, sweep, do the litter box,
sew, make dolls, clean the bathrooms, do laundry, etc.
And, as of last Thursday, January 3rd, I am driving my truck again.
Yep, that's right.
However, I'm very limited.
I can't leave my truck, so I'm limited to drive-thru windows. But I can go pick
up my own RX's now at the pharmacies. I can also go to the bank.
Wanna know how I do it? I leave my wheelchair behind in the house, go outside
with my little gray step-stool-toolbox, push it out to the passenger side of my
truck while scooting on my butt, then I get onto the toolbox, get in the truck,
bring up the toolbox into the truck onto the floorboard, slide over to the
driver's side, buckle up, start up the truck, release the emergency break, and
I'm off to take care of business.
It goes without saying that my truck is equipped with hand controls, so I don't
need legs in order to drive.
Baby steps. It's all about taking baby steps.
And, because of my dust mite allergy and the fact that being in the
wheelchair puts me closer to the carpet on the floor, my asthma is really giving
me a fit. I even ended up in the emergency room a few weeks ago because I was so
congested that I couldn't breathe.
So, Tom, my constant hero, is spending the weekends ripping up the old
carpet, one room at a time, and replacing it with laminate flooring.
OMG, I LOVE it.
I chose Boston Plank because it looks so primitive and it'll go so well with all
my stuff.
Tom has to do one room at a time, and so far he's almost finished with the
hallway and the bedroom. Meanwhile, I have to camp out in the living room to
sleep. Tom moved my bed in there and several other things.
And again, OMG, I LOVE it. Look at these pictures of the shameless luxury it is
to sleep in the living room now.
Every Friday night when Tom arrives I have a fire going in the fireplace,
twinkle lights on the bed, the fireplace mantle, and other places, incense lit,
candles lit, the TV on, the cats in the bed, and plenty of snacks to munch on.
Last Friday we dug out the bed trays and ate Chinese carry-out while watching
TV.
It's absolute heaven. It's the coziest living room in South Carolina.
I think I'll really miss being in the living room when the bedroom floor is
finished and I'm back to normal in there.
And, because Tom loves to shop so much, I do get out of the house on the
weekends. We have a great time and lots of laughs. As he goes down the isles
with the cart I take hold of the back of Tom's coat and 'glide' along behind
him. It's wicked fun to do. Or we'll be in the parking lot and I'll hold his
hand and while he walks I'm gliding along beside him. hahahaha.
This pretty much catches me up to date with what's been going on since The
Nightmare began. I hope it continues to get better and better every day.
What's
New Or Re-Vamped?
Another section I have been
working on is called Catt Nips.
As I said on my
homepage....my divorce is final and I've begun my new life. It'll take me a
while to update this website and get my husband off of here, but please be patient...I've much to do.
A
Book Written by Whisper!
"Phantom
Whispers"
I am so proud of my girlfriend Whisper! She has written a
FANTASTIC poetry book and if you are interested you can see it by following the
link.
More will be coming along soon....I'm working on it when I can!!
My great friend Whisper
finally got her section up with her incredible graphics. I already knew she was
a genius and brilliant, but I wanted all of you to know it, too!...and now you
can see her work.
And while you're there, see
if you can slip around to her front door and see how stunning her site is. She
still has the most beautiful site I have ever seen. She will be adding her new
graphics as she builds them. Check back often.
For
the 'Abuse
Hurts' visitors
I am have gained the courage to
write 'The Secret
Story'. It was very difficult for me, as it brought up very
uncomfortable issues, but one that needed to be told. I wanted to write it in hopes
that someone who has gone through similar situations will know that someone
understands...and I do understand. Sometimes 'understanding' is the greatest
gift you can give someone. No one has all of the answers, if any, but
understanding is a loving embrace. I wrote this for the visitors I get from the Abuse Hurts
website.....I
wanted to share my story with them.
I also offer a Survivor's Gift for
survivors of abuse of all kinds. Please help yourself.
Disclaimer
Everything
that was used on my site, which wasn't my own original, was used with
permission, providing I put a credit/logo link back to the site from where it
was furnished. I have no way of knowing or controlling where other people
obtained these items. If you notice that something belongs to you or someone you
know, please notify me immediately and I will either give the proper credit or
remove the item from my site. Thank you......The Catt.
Dolls that are available for sale!
Studio pictures.
