The Catt Box


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Dorothy was in her bedroom getting herself dressed.
She was so proud of her new outfit. She had made herself a black and white Gingham jumper and a black blouse.
Once again Auntie Em had smuggled in pastel blue and green eye shadows and placed them on Dorothy's dressing table.
With one fell swoop Dorothy took her hand and swept the pastel make up into the garbage.
With a disgusted tone in her voice Dorothy spoke, "Why can't that old biddy see that I already HAVE eye shadow....BLACK eye shadow? Just because SHE wants to look like an Easter egg doesn't mean I want to."

Dorothy LOVED her Gothic bedroom. It reflected her own personality.
Auntie Em HATED Dorothy's bedroom and tried to inflict safe colors and cheerful stuffed animals onto Dorothy.

There was a pounding on the door and everyone was in a huge huff over Toto and Miss Gultch and her precious orange tabby cat. Dorothy was upset and stormed out to the farmyard to think and reflect on the situation. She milled around and finally stopped at some huge farm machinery.


As huge Crows landed on the tractor wheel Dorothy broke out in song:

Somewhere over the rainbow,
Clothes are black,
There's a land free of psychos...
I'm never coming back.

On this side the rainbow,
Here's a clue...
All the dreams that you dare to dream
Really don't come true.

Some day I'll wish upon my scars,
And wake up where the clouds are dark behind me...
Where hair is cut in Barbershops,
Just take a little off the top...
That's where you'll find me.

Somewhere over the rainbow,
Blackbirds fly...
Crows fly over the rainbow,
Why then, oh why can't I?

(then, out of no where, music played)

Some day I'll wish upon my scars,
And wake up where the clouds are dark behind me...
Where hair is cut in Barbershops,
Just take a little off the top,
That's where you'll find me.

Somewhere over the rainbow,
Blackbirds fly...
Crows fly over the rainbow,
Why then, oh why can't I?

If happy little Blackbirds fly,
Beyond the rainbow,
Why, oh why can't I?

When Dorothy finished with her little song of woe she came back into the house to gather some things, including her dog, and run away from home.
"To hell with this place." she said.

Dorothy and her little dog walked for what seemed like miles until they happened on an old man in a bread truck parked along side of the road. He invited her and Toto to come inside and eat corned beef and broccoli, but Dorothy was dieting and Toto had Irritable Bowel Syndrome.
Dorothy knew it was best NOT to upset the dog.

The bread man said he was a psychic, and that for $2.99 he could tell her all about her future.
Dorothy didn't fall for that crap. She had her own Tarot Cards and no jive bread man was going to fool HER!

Right about the time Dorothy was punking the old man the skies grew unusually dark and the winds were gusting. She immediately put Toto under her arm and headed back to the house with the old woman and her pastel make up.

Just as Dorothy and her dog, who was now with explosive diarrhea, got to the house a huge twister was bearing down on the farm. Dorothy ran into her bedroom. Within moments a bread truck crashed into her window, rendering Dorothy unconcious.
Round and round the room went....and then everything stopped with a thud.


Dorothy slowly got up, stood a full 27 inches tall, and walked towards the door. As she opened the door she was horrified. Bright colors nearly blinded her.
Dorothy exclaimed, "This much be Pastel Hell."


Her mouth began to quiver.....what did she ever do to deserve THIS?
She clutched her black basket tightly. There was a squirming inside.
Dorothy lifted the hamper lid and discovered Miss Gultch's petrified tabby cat....seriously, it was now totally made of wood.
Toto didn't make through the twister. The wind blew him inside out.

As Dorothy walked through her door she heard things giggling. Slowly lots of tiny little Peach appeared. They were little midgets, and they looked clean and perfect. And they were wearing pastels.
Everything was pastel.

Suddenly The Mummer's Dance by Loreena Mckennitt started to play. A beautiful orb began to float down among the gigglers.
It was very rhythmic and hypnotic and everyone was being lulled into the seductive dance of the Queen Of The Pastel People.

Just then the Queen congratulated Dorothy for killing an evil person. Dorothy didn't understand. So, the gigglers pointed to underneath the house and the bread truck....there were feet sticking out.

Dorothy walked over and took a closer look. was Miss Gultch...The Snitch...the evil woman who kept telling the cops about Dorothy's dog Toto....bless his heart.

The giggling peach people were elated. They hated evil people.



And then the Queen Of The Peach People made a magic trick. She transferred the red Gultch shoes to Dorothy's feet. They looked wicked-cool with her little black socks with metal spiders!
Dorothy was told that they were special magic shoes. Just then Dorothy began to walk like Forrest Gump and everyone fell out laughing.
Dorothy was kinda comical that way.


And on closer inspection a few midgets shrank back from Dorothy after seeing all those little real bone skulls on her black and white gingham jumper.


Suddenly the Queen Of The Peach People left. The gigglers weren't giggling anymore.
Because out from the crowd of pastel came a small dark figure. It was a midget after Dorothy's own heart. She was a little Goth Witch Midget.
How cool was THAT!
Needless to say, no one in Pastel Hell was politically correct.


Dorothy took her fingerless black-gloved hand and smoothed her dress in place. She also reached up and smoothed her auburn hair adorned with black ribbons.



A small gust of wind blew Dorothy's jumper apart at the front, showing her shapely legs, and a few male Peach People giggled into their hands.


As the little 14 inch Goth Witch Midget approached Dorothy the Peach People started to sing a song in recognition of Dorothy killing the Snitch with the house and the bread truck.

Ding Dong! The Snitch is dead.
Which old Snitch? The Wicked Snitch!
Ding Dong! The Wicked Snitch is dead....


The Gothic Witch Midget told Dorothy to follow her. She said that if she followed the yellow brick road she'd meet up with a scarecrow, a tin man, and a scared lion and that it'd be a waste of time, as no one had ever seen them with a woman.


Then the Gothic Witch Midget gave Dorothy a beautiful cross pendant. She then looked into Dorothy's blue eyes and said, "There's no place like Rome...there's no place like Rome.....there's no place like Rome."


Just then Dorothy spoke out and said, "Rome? I don't want to go to Rome...I want to go HOME....HOME.....HOME."

Dorothy's eyes opened and she was back home again. She was laying in her bed with her black wooden basket. Her Auntie Em was sitting next to her. Then the bread man came to the window to ask if Dorothy was okay. Next, the three farm workers came into her room. They were wearing pastel eye shadow.
See, the Gothic Witch Midget was totally right about them.


Copyright February 9, 2005 Cathy Palmer-Scruggs / Catt Alexander

A super special thanks to eBay seller imosh for the cross pendant and tiny spiders on the socks.



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My dolls are not for everyone, they are my art. If you are offended, I suggest you hit the back button. It will not do you any good to write me 'hate mail'. 

In spite of the dolls I create and the stories I write, I do not use recreational drugs, I don't smoke cigarettes, and I don't even drink alcoholic beverages.